Just when I thought that I had saw that weak candle flame glowing vulnerably in the completely dark maze, it was probably blown off and now I'm lost again.
I've never expected to reach this low, getting more than 30 for L1R5. Many thought that I was joking with them, but probably that's the reason to why I am where I am. The over-expectations I wanted to see and the pressure I'd most probably been pressing myself mentally, unintentionally, all forcing me to overload myself.
I'd never cried that many times in my life. I hate crying, seriously. I shouldn't even cry at all. Where's the strong, determined ChiawMin I used to be? The aftermath of the downpours will always be having heavy eyes that may weigh for about 24hours and that is badly uncomfortable and making me feel sleepy easily.
It's probably the only way for me to let things go and see my weakness. I understand that history may repeat itself in secondary school the way it happened in primary school.
Politics is dark (also applies to school politics), many may not understand. It's so stinky and ugly that I won't want to further elaborate. It's part of the mental scare that is stressing me out.
I think a candle flame is too helpless to even protect itself from going off. I think I need a super high voltage spotlight that is powerful enough to bring light to darkness and show that ever-lasting path clearly.
8:35 pm;
. . . . .
know me
littlest of the Pang Family
people call me ChiawMIN or ZhaoMIN
was from Maha Bodhi School